Review of X-men

Look at this person's face.

With this you can divine her acting talent, both in the movie and in the awesome tv show Mad Men. This was her face THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE MOVIE.






Now look at this person's face.

I've seen her on magazine covers where she did not look like she was storing nuts, but she looked like this in the movie. Except when she was naked.











So picture this naked walking up to you in your home.

Relax, it wasn't that neat.
If my sister walked up to me naked when I was home reading a book, I would scream like Prof. X did. No, more like Banshee. Anyway, the girl gets all mad, because he's "oppressing her" and making her feel like a "freak". "You can't handle the way I look?" Forgetting the fact that maybe her brother wants her to cover up because she's standing there naked.



This is what the movie did over and over, It tried to make points that were invalid. "But Paul," I hear you silently whisper, "it's just a comic book movie. It doesn't have to make sense, as long as it has heroes you can root for and enjoy watching and thinking about afterwards"

That kind of stinkin' thinkin' is what makes comic book movies so retarded nowadays.


And here's an example of the neat characters they provide us that not only annoy you during the show, but also leave a sour "just-swallowed-a-bag-of-urine" taste in your mouth afterwards.

Smug Douchebag Tornado Guy

Sound Waves Make Me Fly Guy

Fired Makeup Person Guy

Lightning Hula Hoops Guy

20 Second Screen Time Token Black Guy

My point is, the whole movie should have been Magneto, Prof. X, and Kevin Bacon. That would have been a solid movie, because every scene with them was pure gold.